How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love WD-40

0900. Welcome to our battlefield. Our morale is sky-high, and our weapons are more advanced than we've ever possessed (yesterday). The cornerstone of our impressive arsensal is a 150-piece Stanley Construction Grade Mechanic's Toolkit, not to mention our secret weapon--designation: WD-40--known only to professional mechanics worldwide.
There shall be no mangled 1/2" adapters today. There shall be no rusted nut unturned. We will dismember the enemy wherever he stands, at a time and in a manner of our choosing. We will take no prisoner. I shite thou not: We will be victorious in time for mid-day chow.

0930. The war is proceeding according to plan. After liberal application of the top-secret WD-40 and battle-proven techniques such as misdirection and forceful insertion/extraction...

the Nuts & Bolt Battalion of the Stability Arm & Ball Joint Division, the victors of yesterday, was downgraded to non-threatening entity status.


1000. We've located our primary objective: to affect a regime change in a corrupt system where the people's hard-earned profits are leaked to waste, where social and political fallouts threaten their once clear voices. In one fell swoop, we will dispose of this greasy dictator. He will be displaced with one firm pull.

One firm pull, my ass. I should've paid more attention to the Fog of War lesson in AFROTC 100. Capt B, I've failed you.

1600. This regime is more firmly rooted than we anticipated, and clings to power like rust on a bearing. Despite our repeated efforts, he could not be unseated. Our strength dwindling, our hope diminishing, a reluctant decision has to be made: we are pulling out, and a quasi-status quo installed in our wake.

Lessons Learned:
How to control our fear of the trenches.
WD-40 is the opposite of duck tape: one's for bringing together; the other for pulling apart.
Rust is a bitch.

Quote of the Day:
"Except for actually doing it, we did everything." --Gen. Lewis