Istanbul: What happened at 30k ft?

How did I end up in Istanbul, of all places in the world? Random.
The trip was destined for craziness, and what better place to begin than the 3-hr plane ride from Sheremyetovo to Ataturk International? I used to be a strong Boeing fan, but now after riding on an Ilyushin-86, I can be a fan of Airbus, too. A few notes on the (dis)comfort level:

• thin ass seats and back support
• broken fold-out table. On my seat, naturally
• little leg room, poor Becky
• no overhead compartments in the center of the fuselage, which was unheard of in our concept design class. While creating a feeling of overall spaciousness, that illusion was soon shattered by the lack of storage space for many people's 2+ carry-ons.
• the seatback actually folds forward, which was kinda cool. I had fun squeezing Kristle in her slumber. Poor Kristle. This will come back to haunt us later though...

Apparently the onboard etiquette are laid out different, as well. The Turks are quite a rowdy bunch and incredibly united when provoked. Case in point: a drunk/insane Russian lady started tossing all kinds of vulgarities at a Turk (unfortunately well endowed in the BO department) for whatever reason, and at first all the Turks just laughed while the Russians disapprovingly shook their heads. By the end of the plane ride, she had apparently found the balls to insult the great former Turkish Pres. Ataturk (which to me is like having a Chinese president named Wat Ah Chink), and that just sent bags full of shit straight into the jet fans. The Turks immediately started yelling, and one guy had to be restrained from rushing to beat the Russian crazy woman up. This is when the flight attendants come in, with their short hair and even shorter temper. An unrelated Russian started a second front by complaining about his peace being disturbed, and the Russian lady sitting next to him returned the volley by defending the flight attendants. All loudly and rudely, of course; what other way is there to argue in this world? Personally, I found it all kinda interesting and amusing. It's like a funny Twilight Zone.
Finally came the long-awaited landing. Ok, a decent touchdown...Hey, why's he braking so hard? Ohmygod, the seatbacks all folded onto us like a La-Z-Boy in reverse. All I could do was laugh; this trip is going to be amazing.